on marriage

One sentiment from a gay acquaintance was along the lines of, "Forget marriage. Being gay is about the bars, the 'screw you' to our traditional families, getting kicked out onto the street but finding our voice anyhow."  I think he was conflating "gay" with "punk" a little.

Another friend made the case for marriage as a civil institution which the Church would bless as in the early days of Christianity - making the secular arrangement a Sacrament and showing how it reflected Christ.  I'm not sure if he was aware that he'd just made a great argument for the Church also finding a way to bless and sanctify the same-sex sort, if it becomes part of the civil institution.

As for me, speaking only as a guy in a hetero marriage, I can attest that marriage is worthwhile.  And so I'm glad that same-sex couples want in, actually - I don't think it harms "the institution" at all, if anything strengthening it by expanding the borders a bit.  The punk-rock sort of gays (and straights) will always be with us, too, I'm sure - those who see the marriage folks as fuddy-duddies, squares, sell-outs.  And that's fine with me.  

Part of youth is rebellion; part of settling down is finding the person you're meant to be with.  What I want to get rid of is the prejudice, the injustice, the failure of government to treat its citizens equally or compassionately.  

For me, if there's already cyberpunk and steampunk, I'd go ahead and call myself married-punk: hack the system to spread around the love and commitment.  Like what you like, dress how you dress, don't just live up to other peoples' expectations. Revel in the weird looks you get from posers who don't get that tattoos and wedding rings don't clash, and that sometimes "I do what I want" means spending your life with your love.  And your cat, in your little suburban house.