Another week gone by...
I was very thankful for the extra day to spend relaxing, courtesy of Washington and Lincoln. It was a beautiful day, and among other activities, I finally got to see "Pan's Labyrinth" (which is kind of like "Narnia" meets "Donnie Darko" meets "Amelie," except in Spanish). Needless to say, I liked it a lot.
Also this last weekend included some quality time spent with Dave G and my fellow claremont folks - and a great Lizst/Mussorgsky piano recital courtesy of Dr. Huang. Good stuff - I've always liked those impressionist composers.
But now, to the true reason for my posting. I believe I can truly say I've left the world a better place, after a realization this morning - namely:
Yoda quotes are the perfect answer to all those questions you never want to hear.
Let me explain, by way of examples. First, a classic -
"Does this make me look fat?"
Previously, there did not exist a good answer to this question, but now, try the following:
"Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not."
An incredibly appropriate answer. And, the better you can do the voice, the more likely you are to have completely escaped your untimely death.
Another example, lest you still doubt:
"Shouldn't we stop and ask for directions?"
To which, one need only reply:
"Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.”
And of course there are more:
"Can my mother stay with us for a while?"
"Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny. "
"Have you cleaned the bathroom like I asked?"
"Around the survivors a perimeter create."
"Have you thought about where this relationship is headed?"
“Ready are you? What know you of ready? For eight hundred years have I trained Jedi. My own counsel will I keep on who is to be trained. A Jedi must have the deepest commitment, the most serious mind. This one a long time have I watched. All his life has he looked away... to the future, to the horizon. Never his mind on where he was. Hmm? What he was doing. Hmph. Adventure. Heh. Excitement. Heh. A Jedi craves not these things. You are reckless.”
Okay, so maybe that last one was less spot-on. And maybe these are more helpful(?) to guys. But Yoda works for the ladies, too!
"So, tonight, what will I find for dinner?"
"Only what you take with you."
"Have you seen the remote?"
"Lost a planet Master Obi-wan has. How embarrassing."
"Is that a grey hair?"
"When 900 years you reach, look as good, you will not."
"How about those Bears?"
"Blind we are, if creation of this clone army we could not see."
Needless to say, I am honored to be able to bestow this wisdom on you the faithful readers.
Remember the one rule, though, if you are going to try to quote Yoda:
"Do or do not. There is no try."
Wednesday, February 21
Tuesday, February 13
Saint Valentine has got to be turning in his grave...
Well, I've been a little subdued lately.
This weekend I went ATV-ing with Jacob, Sarah, and Ryan - it was tons of fun, and my first time out on the sand dunes. It was very exciting and decidedly un-subdued. I came back, though, on Sunday night, already so incredibly sore from the workout that I could barely walk. I'm still a little sore.
Next weekend is a three-day weekend. I'm looking forward to that. Anybody want to do anything?
Not much has been up. No changes here; I long ago discovered I do things at my own pace regardless of holidays, milestones, or social convention. Moreover, I think this stems from a deep desire to do things at God's pace... and I guess he's been slow, lately, too.
I had time to read while not on ATVs this weekend (Jacob's family only owns two, so we couldn't all be out at once) and so I'm a little further in Eldest, and also in "Of God and Men" by A.W. Tozer. Tozer is very convicting and, unfortunately, bad trends he observed back in the 1950s have not reversed themselves since...
"Americans are not naturally an unenthusiastic people... We walk faster, drive faster, earn more, spend more and run a higher blood pressure than any other people in the world.
In only one field of human interest are we slow and apathetic: that is the field of personal religion... So we find this strange and contradictory situation: a world of noisy, headlong religious activity carried on without moral energy or spiritual fervor.
The flush and excitement of the soul in love must be sought in the New Testament or in the biographies of the saints; we look for them in vain among the professed followers of Christ in our day."
Also, I had a great time driving to San Diego and back with Ryan. On the way there, we listened to John Cleese read The Screwtape Letters (yay books on tape!) and I was reminded again of how incredible that book is. On the way back, we had a very timely discussion on the prospect of being single Christian guys and how difficult and awesome that can be. It was a Good time.
Words to the wise in this crazy season:
1. Don't complain about the lack of available "good" members of the opposite gender. You are always wrong, and you just end up seeming bitter and thoughtless. Especially when you complain to members of the opposite gender who happen to be single.
2. Be honest with God and yourself, even if that involves yelling. He will understand.
3. Read 1 Cor. 13:4-8 and remember that it's talking about love for everyone, charity (agape).
4. Remember you are never alone, always loved, and eternally embraced.
"For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known." - 1 Cor. 13:12.
"If your patient is aware that horrors may be in store for him, and is praying for the virtues wherewith to meet them, and meanwhile, concerning himself with the present, because there and there alone all duty, all grace, all knowledge, and all pleasure dwell - his state is very undesirable and should be attacked at once. Here again, our philological arm has done good work: try the word "complacency" on him. But of course, it is most likely that he is living in the present for none of these reasons but simply because his health is good and he is enjoying his work. The phenomenon would then be merely natural. All the same, I should break it up if I were you. No natural phenomenon is really in our favor; and anyway, why should the creature be happy?
Your affectionate uncle,
Screwtape"
This weekend I went ATV-ing with Jacob, Sarah, and Ryan - it was tons of fun, and my first time out on the sand dunes. It was very exciting and decidedly un-subdued. I came back, though, on Sunday night, already so incredibly sore from the workout that I could barely walk. I'm still a little sore.
Next weekend is a three-day weekend. I'm looking forward to that. Anybody want to do anything?
Not much has been up. No changes here; I long ago discovered I do things at my own pace regardless of holidays, milestones, or social convention. Moreover, I think this stems from a deep desire to do things at God's pace... and I guess he's been slow, lately, too.
I had time to read while not on ATVs this weekend (Jacob's family only owns two, so we couldn't all be out at once) and so I'm a little further in Eldest, and also in "Of God and Men" by A.W. Tozer. Tozer is very convicting and, unfortunately, bad trends he observed back in the 1950s have not reversed themselves since...
"Americans are not naturally an unenthusiastic people... We walk faster, drive faster, earn more, spend more and run a higher blood pressure than any other people in the world.
In only one field of human interest are we slow and apathetic: that is the field of personal religion... So we find this strange and contradictory situation: a world of noisy, headlong religious activity carried on without moral energy or spiritual fervor.
The flush and excitement of the soul in love must be sought in the New Testament or in the biographies of the saints; we look for them in vain among the professed followers of Christ in our day."
Also, I had a great time driving to San Diego and back with Ryan. On the way there, we listened to John Cleese read The Screwtape Letters (yay books on tape!) and I was reminded again of how incredible that book is. On the way back, we had a very timely discussion on the prospect of being single Christian guys and how difficult and awesome that can be. It was a Good time.
Words to the wise in this crazy season:
1. Don't complain about the lack of available "good" members of the opposite gender. You are always wrong, and you just end up seeming bitter and thoughtless. Especially when you complain to members of the opposite gender who happen to be single.
2. Be honest with God and yourself, even if that involves yelling. He will understand.
3. Read 1 Cor. 13:4-8 and remember that it's talking about love for everyone, charity (agape).
4. Remember you are never alone, always loved, and eternally embraced.
"For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known." - 1 Cor. 13:12.
"If your patient is aware that horrors may be in store for him, and is praying for the virtues wherewith to meet them, and meanwhile, concerning himself with the present, because there and there alone all duty, all grace, all knowledge, and all pleasure dwell - his state is very undesirable and should be attacked at once. Here again, our philological arm has done good work: try the word "complacency" on him. But of course, it is most likely that he is living in the present for none of these reasons but simply because his health is good and he is enjoying his work. The phenomenon would then be merely natural. All the same, I should break it up if I were you. No natural phenomenon is really in our favor; and anyway, why should the creature be happy?
Your affectionate uncle,
Screwtape"
Tuesday, February 6
Self explanatory?
No, I don't have a cat. Nor am I suddenly a cat person. But cats do seem to lend themselves to photography and amusing captions, which I can appreciate.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)